I guess that as I run Custard and Bear people expect that I should always act like some marketing guru, never have a wobble about my abilities, or doubt my capabilities.
But hey, I’m human, and Lordy do I worry and doubt myself. Despite Boris, despite Bake Off, despite all of my creativity I often sit and wonder: “Am I any bloody good at what I do?”
That’s when Kieran usually enters centre stage and slaps me with a big wet fish. But even that cold, slimy dose of reality doesn’t always help me.
So today was a turning point. I met with the beautiful and bonkers Gillian Smellie from Lifecycles for the first time. Gillian is one of my first Marketing for Mummies clients and I was really excited about meeting with her, but also nervous because this was the first time I’d taken Marketing for Mummies out for a spin and tried my concept on a real, live client.
And Gillian was as real and as live as they come – she is a tarot reading, bamboo clothes selling, kids booking writing, Reiki practicing bubble of energy and, I suspect, a very forthright, tell-it-how-it-is-lady who would have simply told me that she didn’t get what I saying and politely take her leave of me had we not clicked.
But click we did and it was a joyous hour of chatting and starting to come up with ideas to help Gillian promote Lifecycles.
When we said our goodbyes we gave each other a massive hug (I’d never met her until today!) and she left me sitting in the Marks and Sparks cafe with a stupid grin on my face. And then I started to shake, and then my lip started to quiver, my chin to tremble and I called Kieran and started to cry. The conversation went something like this:
Me: “Kieran, that was amazing. Gillian was amazing, and just the whole experience was amazing. I loved it. I can do this. Marketing for Mummies. I can actually do it. Thank you. Thank you for loving me and believing in me.”
Kieran: “Of course you can do it. I’ve been telling you that for years. About bloody time Mrs Rose!”
I’ve been in Marketing for my whole career, I’m onto my second business, I’m bringing up three amazing kids and yet every day I carry doubt around with me. But today something clicked and it was wondrous. Self belief felt truly amazing. It could become addictive…
You should try it some time…
Do you believe in yourself? Tell me your story, I’d love to hear it!